I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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