Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
