3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I FOUND THE LEGS
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize