I molested 6 butterflies tonight
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Come on in and take your pants off
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