I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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