PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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