he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
