Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
no you cant smoke seaweed
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
