Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
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