No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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