butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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