i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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