when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
