WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
My ass is underappreciated
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
