Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
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WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
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he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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