Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
