That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
