they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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