im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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