Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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