i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Randomize
