Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize