question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
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