Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
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