I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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