I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Randomize
