Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
