it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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