Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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