He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
