David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
