By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
