the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
