dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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