Kareoke will never be a sober sport
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
