carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
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