hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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