Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
