my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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