I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Randomize
