i was rollin on her like bob the builder
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize