hell yes lets make some ravioli
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
