is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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