We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
