Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
