I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
