I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob