Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(541): View more from Oregon

Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.

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(571): View more from Virginia

the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets

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(817): View more from Texas

idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on

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(618): View more from Illinois

It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.

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These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
Read it at the TFLN blog
(206): View more from Washington

Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.

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(916): View more from California

Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.

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(512): View more from Texas

But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already

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(757): View more from Virginia

Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?

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