Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
We don't watch enough power rangers
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
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