so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
