Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
