I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
